a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
