paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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