Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize