if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
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