My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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