Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
