I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
