I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
