a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
