Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
