your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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