I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
