Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Randomize
