Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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