Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize