Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
