Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
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