TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
