found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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