so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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