I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
