I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
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