I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
