It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
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