Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
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