Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
