i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Randomize
