i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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