Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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