i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
