Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
