so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Randomize
