it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
