I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize
