matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
