You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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