Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
