How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
