the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
