I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Who died my cat blue again?
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
