Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
And then he peed in my hair
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