Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
