Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
