i don't like sucking hair
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Randomize