I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize