Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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