Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Randomize
