Me too!
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
God I need to hump something, right now.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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