What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Randomize
