He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
